Of Remembralls and Likenesses
by codenamelily
Summary: Cedric wanted to please his father, but couldn't find a way to explain to him that he was more likely to have a civil union with a handsome, charming wizard and adopt Malaysian orphans. CedricNeville


Title: Of Remembralls and Likenesses  
Rating: PG  
Genre: Drama, Romance  
Characters/Pairing: Cedric/Neville  
Summary: _Cedric wanted to please his father, but couldn't find a way to explain to him that he was more likely to have a civil union with a handsome, charming wizard and adopt Malaysian orphans. _  
Author's Notes: Feedback is always appreciated! ) Written for the loyalty theme at badgerchallenge over on LJ.

When Cedric Diggory was twelve years and two months old, he stumbled into the cellar of his home to find his mother hanging gracefully from the rafters by her neck.

It was his first year at Hogwarts and he had missed his family terribly. The castle was amazing, that was true, but whilst he made new friends and tried to find his way about the castle, he had been longing to come home and let his mother wrap her arms around him. He counted down the days until Christmas from even before Halloween.

The Hogwarts Express had arrived precisely on time, as always, and met his father at Platform 9 ¾. It was slightly disappointing – he missed his father, too, but Cedric had been looking forward to his mother's flowery perfume and warming hug (even though he knew he would pretend to be embarrassed by it). To Cedric, his mother was the most beautiful woman in the world. She had long, bouncy dark hair and a beautiful smile that had a kiss hidden in the corner, just like the one Mrs. Darling had in I Peter Pan /I . As a child, Cedric had read the book many times, and each time he would imagine Mrs. Darling to be a woman just like his mother. And, to tell the truth, Cedric didn't particularly want to be left with his father. Ever since he could remember, Cedric knew his father wanted him to be sorted into Ravenclaw, just like he had been. Only the brainiest, his father would say, and you're a brainy one, aren't you, Ced?

Cedric always agreed, though sometimes he didn't feel particularly brainy, and really thought that of all the houses, he would like the friendly Hufflepuffs best. One of the witches in his neighbourhood ran a home schooling program for the younger witches and wizards and he always had to work doubly hard just to keep up with the rest of the class. But, he would tell himself, when I do well, my parents are proud. He would tell himself that anything was worth hearing a 'Good job, Ced!' or a 'Well done, my boy!' from his father. When the Sorting Hat had screamed out ' I Hufflepuff! /I ' at the Sorting Ceremony earlier that year, Cedric had nearly cried when he realized he wouldn't hear his father say anything like that about a Hufflepuff boy, though he was proud to know that the Hat thought he was hardworking and even I loyal /I .

So arriving on the platform to find only his father was a bit intimidating for the young boy. His father didn't say anything about any sortings, however, and instead welcomed Cedric home with a hearty grin.

They stopped in Ottery St. Catchpole on the way home to buy a Christmas present for his mum. Cedric was quite proud of what he picked out – a lovely bath soap set made by a kindly Muggle lady with a rather bumpy nose. He paid the lady with some pocket money he had saved from his birthday, and scurried after his father as they returned to the house.

He snuck into the house while his father cleared away some of the snow outside and ran upstairs to hide the present before his mum could find it. After making sure it was tucked away safely in the back of his wardrobe, he called out for her. When she didn't answer, he thumped back downstairs to the kitchen. He called for her again, then came to the conclusion that she was probably doing the washing in the cellar.

Cedric didn't particularly like the cellar. It wasn't so bad for his parents, who could just light their wand and make their way down, but Cedric had to feel his way down the stairs and pull the cord that turned the light on at the bottom. The laundry room was behind the stairs, and Cedric called for his mum one more time. As he reached the bottom stair, he felt around in the air in front of him for the cord, pulling on it just as he slipped off the stair.

His mum hung in front of him, her body still sashaying gently. A chair lay tipped on its side beneath her, and her beautiful face was red and purple. Cedric stumbled back against the staircase, staring at the blotches he would later know to be burst capillaries in her cheeks. Her arms dangled limply by her sides, and her feet seemed to be trying to reach for the floor.

He stared at her, barely processing the situation, until he heard the front door slam and his father call his name. He turned shakily and crawled up the stairs.

'What's wrong, Ced?' asked his father as Cedric pulled himself into the kitchen. He tried to explain to his father, tell him not to go down the stairs, but his emotions betrayed him and tears began to fall freely down Cedric's cheeks. It was all his father needed, and he ran down the stairs. A horrified, strangled noise floated up the stairs and Cedric had to sit down at the table. Sitting there was a note that he hadn't noticed before. With pale, shaky hands, Cedric picked it up.

I Dear Amos /I , it began,

_ I I am hoping you find this before you go into the cellar. Please keep Cedric away from there. I don't want him to see._

I don't know what to say, Amos. You know I love you so, and Cedric. But I just can't live with myself anymore. Every day seems to be more difficult than the last, and every day I feel as though I've done nothing except fail you. The only good thing I've ever done with my life is giving Cedric life, and now he's left home for school and I won't get to see him anymore.

I love you, Amos. Please always remember that. And remind my son that I love him more than anything that ever was or ever will be. It is because I love you that I do this – I can't live knowing that I am a constant failure to the both of you.

I want you to move on, Amos. None of this 'mourning and grieving' period. I know there's a woman out there who can be a better wife and mother than I could ever be, and I want you to find her.

Please tell my baby that I love him and I'll always be proud of him. I love you, darling.

Always and forever,

_**Dypmhna /I **_

Cedric's father pounded up the stairs and grabbed the note from Cedric's hands.

'Get your trunk,' said his father, crumpling the note. 'We're Flooing to Aunt Mafalda's.'

Cedric had never seen his father with tears in his eyes, and as he raced up the stairs, he hoped never to see it again.

-----

Five years later, Cedric Diggory was sitting in the library at Hogwarts, studying vigorously. It wasn't a particularly unusual sight – Cedric studied three times as hard as anyone in his house, and nearly ten times as hard as anyone in Ravenclaw. This year, however, Cedric was studying for different reasons. He had only one week left until he had to face the dragons in the first task of the Triwizard Tournament.

He had nearly backed out of putting his name into the Goblet. But Cedric could imagine the look on his father's face if he was chosen to be the Hogwarts champion, and without really believing that he I could /I be the champion, he put his name in.

Any chance Cedric had now to impress his father, he took. After his mother's death, Amos Diggory had begun to cling to Cedric, as though he were all he had left of the woman. Last year, though, Cedric's father had remarried. Cedric didn't particularly like the new woman. She completed the picture perfect family that Cedric's father wanted so desperately, and with that completion came the pressure to succeed more than ever. He wanted a handsome, intelligent, athletic, and charming son who would eventually marry a beautiful, clever, graceful young witch and have round, bouncy little grandchildren. Cedric wanted to please his father, but couldn't find a way to explain to him that he was more likely to have a civil union with a handsome, intelligent, athletic, and charming wizard and adopt Malaysian orphans. So instead, he dated Cho Chang and felt like a coward.

Cedric didn't notice the library slowly begin to darken as he continued to study until a glowing red light began to flicker in the corner of his eye. He turned his head to see the only other person in the library - a Gryffindor who he knew to be friends with Harry sitting a table, holding a glowing red orb in his hands.

It was a Remembrall, Cedric realized, and he forgot the books in front of him as he watched the Gryffindor roll the orb between his palms. The glow splashed across the boy's face and Cedric studied him.

His name was Norman, Cedric though. Norman… no, Nicholas… Neville. His name was Neville. Cedric vaguely recalled the boy running down a corridor the previous year, covered in what seemed to be an exploded potion.

He was cute, Cedric decided. Fairly plump, with rosy round cheeks. He had dark hair that fell into his dark eyes and a slight overbite.

Cedric watched him for a few moments before he noticed that Neville looked rather unhappy. With a contemptuous glance at the books lying in front of him, he stood up and walked to the young boy's table.

'Neville, right?' asked Cedric. Neville glanced up and nodded, immediately turning his gaze back to the Remembrall. 'I'm…'

'Cedric,' finished Neville. 'I know.'

'Everyone knows,' Cedric scoffed, slightly embarrassed. 'Can I sit here?'

Neville's forehead furrowed into a frown as he looked across the library at Cedric's table, where his books still sat. 'Yeah, I guess,' Neville said. 

Cedric sat. Neville began to roll the glowing orb back and forth between his hands, like it was some useless ball.

'Those things are really amazing,' said Cedric. 'I wouldn't break it, if I were you.'

'I won't break it,' Neville replied, exasperated. 'Besides, it's useless.'

'Useless!' coughed Cedric. 'That's a brilliant piece of magic, there.'

Neville shrugged. 'It always glows. What's the point of knowing I've forgotten something if I can't remember what I've forgotten?' Cedric fell silent for a moment. 'Why'd you come over here? You know I'm friends with Harry, right?'

''Course I know,' replied Cedric.

'Well then, what do you want? Come over to make fun of me for it?'

'Why would I do that?' By this point, Cedric was completely perplexed.

'Everyone knows you don't like Harry,' mumbled Neville. 'But he's my friend,' he added fiercely. 'So I don't care what anyone says about him.'

Cedric shook his head in amazement. 'You sure you're in the right house?' he asked.

'You don't think I'm brave?' shot back Neville.

'That's not what I meant. I meant you're loyal. Like a Hufflepuff.'

Neville shrugged again. 'Harry said I was brave for talking to him at a time like this.'

''Suppose it could be that, too.'

The two boys stopped talking for a moment and Neville finally met Cedric's eyes. 'Why'd you come over here?'

It was Cedric's turn to shrug. 'You looked upset. And besides – ' he grinned boyishly ' – I needed a study break.'

'You study a lot.' Neville glanced at Cedric's books across the library. 'My gran always says I should study more.'

'My dad wants me to… well…' Cedric stopped himself and cleared his throat.

'Wants you to be just like him?'

'Something like that, yeah.'

Neville finally smiled. 'My gran wants me to be like my dad. He was an Auror.' A glimmer of pride flickered across Neville's round face. 'Gran says he was smart and funny and really, really handsome. She says I need to study more and hopes I grow into my face.'

Cedric stifled a laugh, despite the seriousness of Neville's tone. 'My dad just wants me to be the perfect son,' he said. 'I just want to make him proud, but sometimes…'

'I know,' interrupted Neville. 'My gran wants me to be my dad all over again. I haven't even got my own wand. She keeps getting angry that I can't do better in school.'

'Professor Sprout says you're apt with Herbology,' Cedric offered.

'Gran says it's a useless subject,' Neville muttered. 'Probably because it's the only one I like.' His tone brightened for a moment. 'Did Professor Sprout really say that?'

Cedric nodded. 'Told us that all the Fly-Traps were fed by you last class.' The look of pride on Neville's face astonished Cedric. He couldn't help but smile as Neville blushed. 'I'm sure your gran'll understand sooner or later.'

Neville's face fell again, and Cedric mentally kicked himself. 'She won't,' he said glumly. 'The only thing I want to do after Hogwarts is become a Herbologist, and she'll kill me before she lets that happen.'

'There's lots of things I want to do that my dad won't ever allow,' Cedric said quietly, thinking of his Malaysian orphans.

'I think the shock of having a Herbologist poofter for a grandson would probably kill my gran.'

Cedric nearly fell out of his chair. 'A… sorry, what did you say?'

Neville blushed fiercely. 'A… you know…' He cleared his throat. 'I shouldn't've told you that. It's not really a secret, but would you mind not, you know, telling everyone?'

'I won't tell anyone,' Cedric said dazedly. 'I didn't… I wouldn't have pegged you for one.'

Neville stood up, shocking Cedric. 'Never mind,' he mumbled. 'I'll see you around.' Neville was halfway across the library before Cedric had grasped what was happening. Standing quickly, he rushed back to his table and snatched his books from the table, pealing after the Gryffindor.

'Neville, wait!' cried Cedric the second he was out of the library. Neville was walking quickly down the deserted corridor, and by the time Cedric caught up with him, he was in a narrow hall that Cedric thought led to the Slytherin common room.

'What?' Neville stopped suddenly, and Cedric nearly crashed into him. He stopped and looked at Neville, whose face was red.

'I…'

'It's almost curfew and I'd rather not be late,' Neville said coldly.

Cedric couldn't think of anything to say, so he did the first thing that came to his mind, grabbed Neville by the shoulders, and kissed him.

Not just any kiss, though. Cedric had kissed Cho Chang a time or two and it was nothing like this. Cedric full out, completely, with every ounce of strength in him, i _kissed /i _ Neville.

It took a moment or two before Neville kissed him back. The second Neville responded, Cedric let his hands move from grasping Neville's shoulders to winding themselves in the boy's dark hair, holding fistfuls of it as he pressed Neville's head closer to his. He knew Neville felt awkward – his hands were fluttering nervously by his side for a moment before one tentatively reached up to brush against Cedric's neck – but Cedric didn't pull away until his lungs demanded he do so.

They stepped away from each other quickly, Cedric panting slightly, and Neville's face redder than Cedric had ever seen it. His entire body was tingling and he was fairly sure that Neville was shaking, or that his vision had taken on a jittery quality.

'I'm sorry,' he finally managed to stutter. 'I… didn't…'

'I never would have pegged you for one, either,' Neville gasped.

Cedric grinned, a boyish grin, and felt hesitant laughter slowly bubble up from his stomach. 'My dad would kill me,' he chuckled.

'And my gran,' added Neville, smiling. Cedric shook his head.

'If he ever found out about the Malaysian orphans…'

Neville frowned, obviously bewildered, but looked as though he'd rather not ask. Instead he reached forward and grabbed Cedric's hand, placing the glowing Remembrall in his palm.

'So you don't forget,' he muttered shyly. 'I think you'll appreciate it a lot more than I do.'

He turned away and began to leave down the corridor. Cedric stared after him as the Remembrall slowly stopped glowing.

'Neville?' he called. Neville turned back and looked at him. 'Did… was that… I mean, have you ever…?'

Neville shook his head. 'I didn't know anyone else who was… well… you know.'

Cedric nodded slowly and glanced down at his hands. He held up the Remembrall.

'Thanks,' he said. Neville smiled shyly and turned away, continuing down the corridor.


End file.
